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[07 Dec 2009|06:49pm] [ music | Alice In Chains - No Excuses ] The next 2 years will be the most painful of all. In order to avoid drowning in this sea of lies that I filled my own world with- I must tear down everything that claims to be me. These are the lies that comprise the me of yesterday, but for tomorrow I no longer wish this on myself. Or anybody else. The pain that I save you from today will only return as an endless gauntlet of hell if I don't act now. Who am I? The only thing I know is that you don't know me. Happy birthday to me. 1 fragment| shatter the glass nebula

[04 Dec 2009|10:37am] make it go away make it go away please make it go away.... i'm sorry... i've been very bad... please stop... i'll behave now, master... please... shatter the glass nebula

[03 Dec 2009|09:27pm] this is terrible. a disease so terrible even the most torrid fuck will not cure it. God made me this way? damn it. a captive of my genes. born to crave, consume and crave again. shatter the glass nebula

[07 Nov 2009|09:43pm] If the world be so contaminated, let this crime stain my contemptuous heart corrupt. Better a heart that delights in wrong, than an empty cavern where the righted heart once stayed. -- You, sir, you put your cock where it wasn't supposed to kill two birds with one stone, and now your disciple has come to wage war in my garden? Fuck you, and have another durian up your ass while we're at it. shatter the glass nebula

[02 Oct 2009|04:40pm] why do i want so much when i seem to deserve so little? why do i have so much when i want so little of it? you, i spent years writing about, now you're gone. but in your place is someone else cut from the same cloth as you. the circle begins again, the flaying draws new blood. shatter the glass nebula

wretched [01 Oct 2009|06:52pm] [ music | Nine Inch Nails - Piggy ] the skin, the center will not hold undisclosed desires, they can't stay inside i must straighten myself out or sanity'll go cold so why're you so distant, why do your eyes hide? to think we almost could have. i am sin, i am rage, i'm no saint raw sex is what's left in me, no brains, no heart not even a speck of love to impart but the me you know, you never meant to taint. you won't let me, you'd point me to what i must save but what i have is not what i need that chaste thing, for that i wouldn't bleed for you, i'd push all of this shit to the grave for you, i'd ask to be only your slave. to think we almost could have. shatter the glass nebula

[12 Sep 2009|11:21pm] broken, bruised, forgotten, sore too fucked up to care anymore poisoned to my rotten core too fucked up to care anymore shatter the glass nebula

[13 Jun 2009|10:50am] this world is a vacuum that sucked out my soul and left me holding on to what i think is comfort. for fear of the evil in this world, i stay in my cocoon and behave like the enslaved, only without the actual chains. don't mistake comfort for happiness, i say. this i can say to friends. but to myself? what is rationality? is rationality what stops me from jumping out of a plane? is rationality the excuse i'm giving to halt myself from diving out of this cocoon? there is no turning back if i choose to go into the world alone and naked. there is no salvation if i lie here and let my senses rot. there is no shelter if in the barrenness of life, i find myself dying. maybe if i begin to truly die in this desert, i will feel life. knowing pain isn't enough to know the meaning of life. we only learn to hold on to our lives dearly when death has dug his sickle deep enough into our fleshly sacks. shatter the glass nebula

[23 Mar 2009|11:07pm] all my pain to live inside my karma|face shatter the glass nebula

blood will follow blood [17 Feb 2009|11:41am] [ music | Metallica - Damage Inc. ] i've let my life slip away. all the things i could have tried, i didn't. do people forget themselves through these experiences because they are lonely? or did they attain an epiphany that set them independent and free of the chains of longing? i have made mistakes - at this point there is no recourse to make up for those failings. i am simply depressed at the notion of all this regret filling my life - and i do not even feel motivated to do anything about it. shatter the glass nebula

turmoil on the brink [10 Jan 2009|09:52am] [ music | Tool - Vicarious ] master of puppets, he's pulling your strings, twisting your mind, smashing your dreams blinded by me - you can't see a thing if i were a lesser man then this would have been all too easy. but my damnable conscience is too strong. far too strong. i could never look myself in the mirror again. only a shell could stop himself questioning his sanity. at least i walked away. shatter the glass nebula

x [02 Jan 2009|07:35am] [ music | Metallica - Master of Puppets ] addiction is the deepest, darkest hole of all from which death is indeterminable yet inevitable, our own inherent Darwinian extermination of vermin. shatter the glass nebula

curves in tempest [31 Dec 2008|12:16pm] [ music | Killswitch Engage - Reject Yourself ] I am rotting more than ever before, stale as the mire of cavernous death, perverse like the reaper's tendrils. Where others ascend, I bring myself down to thoughts only the unforgiven can bear: the broken wheel of the unsatisfied I must ride. Don't let me be this way, oh what I've known must be incarcerated and burned at the stake with my passions. shatter the glass nebula

i'm sick to the stomach because [28 Dec 2008|09:10pm] Do you know what I see? I see a kaleidoscope of what-ifs. You tell me what I can have. You set the standards and I follow. shatter the glass nebula

[17 Dec 2008|01:17am] [ music | System of a Down - Deer Dance ] your society defeated me by denying me the ability to be normal. i'll take your normalcy and cast it into anarchy. burn this circus, burn it all down, and maybe the dogs will rebuild it. shatter the glass nebula

lies from the tablecloth [15 Dec 2008|02:15am] [ music | Megadeth - Take No Prisoners ] The system is more broken than you and I can ever know. But you sheep, you drink and fuck and keep this charade going. We let them rape our minds with their threats, we submit perpetual obedience. The weak are speechless in heart and castrated in action. The rich are careless souls who give not two hoots. We chessmen fight in such a fragile house of cards. Strength lies in an army, even an army of headless lemmings. But no one can identify a single piece strong enough to lead... A piece where we can start to wake this system up. 2 fragments| shatter the glass nebula

[06 Aug 2008|08:16am] why am i preaching to the unwashed? all they ever want is my shadow. not me. shatter the glass nebula

[03 Aug 2008|03:45am] the deeper i sink the more and more i hate this guilt. man can never find happiness. man can only choose it, or choose to not have it. but what is it that you have chosen? this fake, self-delusional machination you hold on to... this is not happiness either. if nirvana is nil then maybe we all should go. shatter the glass nebula

[27 Jul 2008|12:03pm] [ music | Metallica - One ] to be safe in this crazy world where everyone hides some disturbed method of madness beneath their exquisite exteriors, i have chosen the path that does not shine. path of a lifeless shell perhaps, but better than the lunacy of the poi holloi. i do not need to perform for the likes of you - i answer to myself and the only ones important who're still left here. shatter the glass nebula

[04 Jun 2008|09:07pm] hijacked! 1 fragment| shatter the glass nebula

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